New Element in the Periodic Table

• A new element called woman
• A new element has to be added in the Periodic Table which is recommended by my experienced friend.
• Element : Woman
• Symbol : Wo
• Discoverer : Adam Eden Garden
• Atomic mass: Accepted as 53.6 kg; isotopes vary from 35 – 200 kg.
• Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:

1. Surface usually covered with thin painted film
2. Boils at room Temperature
3. Freezes without any known reason
4. Melts if given special treatment
5. Bitter if incorrectly used
6. Sweeter under certain conditions
7. Found in various states, ranging from metals to common ore
8. Ductile if molded properly
9. Yields to pressure under tender touches

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:

1. Have great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones and absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
2. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason
3. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increases by saturation in alcohol
4. Most powerful money non-reducing agent known to man

COMMON USES:

1. Highly ornamental, especially in bikes and cars
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agent

TESTS:

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen

AVAILABILITY:

1. Available in wide different forms and varieties
2. Can be easily seen in all busy areas

POTENTIAL HAZARDS:

1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
2. Illegal to posses more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other

• !!! WARNING !!! PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE FINANCIAL HEMORRHAGE AND MENTAL DISTRESS